Last night I was texting a new-found friend, and we were discussing the value of friendship. It is a hard thing to measure, and it seems to differ depending on the individual. There are, it seems, people in this world that collect friends, they are more concerned with the number of Facebook friends they have, or the number of people they can recognise in the street… People are more concerned with knowing people than getting to know people.
Said friend say the phrase above, “You and I both know the value of things, four quarters are always better than 100 cents” .
I think it’s a shame that people have come around to this way of thinking. When people are more concerned with public opinion and perception rather than reality and a persons essence.
In response to this I have one thing to say… I don’t have many friends. I’m not that popular, I can’t list 100 people I know or have that many numbers in my phone. I don’t throw big elaborate birthday parties, or drop names to sound self-important. I don’t care if you think i’m uncool for not knowing as many people as you. I’m unconcerned with your perception of me for not caring.
To me, friends, real friends are hard to come by. They are few and far between, diamonds in the rough. A friend is not a person that fleetingly drop into your life and in a year has disappeared out of it again. A friend is not someone you just go out with, or someone you know from your course/work. A friend is not something gained over night or lost by the morning…
As a man put it more eloquently than me…
“True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and choice.” – Samuel Johnston
I am privileged to have five friends in my life, that I truly love and adore. I would jump in front of a bus for them, drive to them whenever they needed, answer the phone to them at 3 am, understand that if I don’t speak to them for a week, it doesn’t mean they don’t care… We have all heard it say that “friends are the family we choose for ourselves” well I don’t know about you but I come from a very small close-knit family, and my friendship circle reflects that.
Most of my friends don’t know each other, they are part of different areas of my life, and there paths seemingly never cross, but despite this, without them, my life would be incomplete, superficial. They help to ground us, to comfort us, to guide us, to laugh with us, support us, thank us, berate us when need be.
For all of those friend whores, people collectors and acquaintance counters, I pity you. For you shall never know friendship as friendship was intended to be.
“A friend is trust, a friend is love
A friend is giving a supportive hug
A friend is kind, a friend is fair,
A friend is always there to care
A friend is honest, a friend is won
A friend is there till the day is done
A friend is rare, a friend is sure
A friends intention is always pure.
A friend is dear, a friend if true
A friend will never leave you”